Thursday, November 24, 2011

What would the Germans say?

This is 100% genuine.
I just found this whilst looking on my PC at some old files.
This is years old, back in the time when on-line translation systems were worse than they are now!
What I did was chuck a load of old cheesy jokes into an English to German translator...and this was the result:


Why on earth did the chicken go and cross the road!
Because of the fact that he was going to the other side of the road?

What will witches ride in on in the future motor powered!
They will be on a vroomsticks?

What did the horse who went in to the pub and the landlord said!
Why is your face so long horse?

How do you eventually know when its time to pull yourself together!
Your doctor mistakes you for curtain?

What does the astronaut park his car at!
Up the parking meteors?

What do you cross if you cross a sheep and a kangaroo!
Warm Jumper?

Man to butcher I'd like two pork chops please!
Butcher which way would you like them to lean?

Doctor doctor I feel like beans on toast!
Shut up you skinhead get back on the raft ?

Why the boy threw his clock out of a window!
How time flies?

Whats the difference between a knock knock and a doctor doctor!
Thats a Irishman of course it is?

Q: what is the capital of the Japan?
A: J.

Q: vot call you a street, where all crazy people are?
A: a psycho path.

Q: what did a chicken call crossing the street?
A: feather cattle in movement ya.

Q: what did the zero to the eight make say?
A: "Hey. . . Volume nice"

A dog went in a telegraph office to send a telegram. It have, "Woof, woof, woof, woof, woof, woof, woof, woof, Woof,
Then the secretary what the dog reads written has, and, said gives "it only nine words here!!!. It could send another 'Woof' for the same price silly dog friend.
"But, that dog reciprocated, "the message then any sense no make frauhlein.

Q: what happened to the hölzernen wood car?
A: it goes woods, yah, it really doos.

Q: a man goes to the doctor. The man has a strawberry that are awake out of his head.
A: the doctor says "that you have any Kreme to give me to place on it"

A man goes in injured to the doctor, "Doc, I've my arm in several places:
the doctors says, "goods. . . there are more arms in udder places. ha ha".

A man was murdered in its home at the weekend. ALT+0160
Detectives have it with the front door. After below in the bathtub the tub is with milk, Cornflakes, and banana disks found has been filled up.
Polize Bureau a grain murderer seek!!!

Q: what will you pour dilutes when you be named a rabbit hole?
A: a hot cross bunny herr friend.

Q: you know how the magnificent gorge Big Canyon was formed?
A: a Scot man and gopher hole dropped his penny down.

A bear runs into a rod bar. So the Barkeeper ask, "what I receive can you?"
the bears answer, "I'll has a gin. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ya und tonic,
that of the Barkeeper ask, "why the large recess und spikly paws?"

Q: what did the farmer say lost when its tractor?
A: "SHNELL, where's my tractor?"

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